God did not create us to be solitary beings. Joy and happiness are to be shared. Everyone needs that one person they can be comfortable with, to pour out their heart and soul to, and not be judged or criticized. That’s why couples get married; they have found that special person. We all need a BFF. 🙂
I have friends, but I hadn’t had a BFF since mine passed on almost 15 years ago. We could share our deepest darkest feelings and know it would go no further. We understood each other and related on a profound personal level. We went out to dinner and a movie every Friday night for over ten years. Friends like that are few and far between. I was ready for another one.
About four years ago my mother passed away. We had lived together for about 25 years, and it felt odd not to have someone around to share things with. I missed that. She was not a BFF, but we shared on a superficial level. Because of my abusive father my mother and I never developed a close mother-daughter relationship. I knew that now was the time and opportunities for me to meet people and form a new BFF relationship would open up if I didn’t worry about it. Worry is one of those things that block the road to success. Companionship is important, and I knew that I could not be deprived of something that was part of God’s creation, and was right for me to have.
My neighbor, two doors away, had lost her husband and shortly after her sister, and was all alone in her house like me. We had lived two doors apart for 11 years but never started up a friendship. She was caring for her husband and sister, and I was caring for my elderly mother. We started talking when we were outside, and for the last 4 years, we see each other regularly. When the need is there, God fills it.
We are there for each other in many ways. It is a friendship built on mutual trust. We can say anything and not be judged. We don’t agree on everything but respect each other’s right to have differing opinions. She has worked with me on my book and approves all my blogs before I post them. It’s a mutual need. She needs something to do, and I need my work proofed. We talk about anything and everything. We laugh a lot. We get our nails done every other Monday, that is one of those little pleasures I never indulged in until after I retired. We go out to eat a lot. She is my new BFF, and I know that feeling is shared, and I am also grateful we live close.
When you have a BFF, you see everything in a different light. You are happier and more trusting of other people. It is easier for you to develop other relationships. I made friends with several of my other neighbors too. There is always someone around when I am outside to wave at and greet. It is such a pleasure to have friends around to meet and greet. During my years suffering from the effects of child abuse, I didn’t have this. I didn’t know how to be a friend; I felt awkward trying to communicate with people, and I am so happy I have broken through that barrier. I talk about this in other blogs.
Having a BFF is important. If you don’t have one, break down those walls that separate you from those around you, who are so willing to be your friend. If you have suffered at the hand of others, know that is not what God intended for you. If you listen for His guidance, he will open the way for you to find meaningful relationships.
If you are suffering from the effects of child abuse, I pray that my blogs are helping you see that you can get past that, and live a productive, happy life. God wants you to be happy and have friends that you can have a mutually loving relationship with. So open your eyes and heart, your BFF may be standing right in front of you. 🙂